| If you think parenting one child drives you to the | | | | For the next week, I barely spoke to them. I didnot |
| nearest | | | | prepare a meal for them nor did I provideany spending |
| Starbucks for a double espresso latte, try parenting | | | | money for their little extras. |
| two. See if you can relate to this article on parenting: | | | | I did not know what to do. At work the nextday, I cried |
| The day my twin daughters were born was the | | | | on my friend's shoulder. She led meto a breakthrough |
| proudest day ofmy life. I was a celebrity in the hospital | | | | that changed allof our lives. A summary of some of |
| while I recoveredfrom my labor. Little did I know that | | | | the thingsshe told me I still use to deal with my children. |
| the days, months andyears ahead would have me | | | | 1) Do not try to be a friend to your childrenbut treat |
| crying, screaming, threatening andsometimes regretting | | | | them as if they were your friend. |
| bringing these children into the world. | | | | Always be the parent. Parent your childrenwith |
| I was a young mother just out of college with a bright | | | | respect and value their opinions. You don't scream at |
| futureand big plans. When I discovered that I was | | | | your friends, you don'tberate them or threaten. offer |
| pregnant, I putsome of those big plans on hold to be | | | | constructivecriticism. Always try to couch your tone |
| become the perfectparent to my perfect little angels. I | | | | andthe words you use with a true concern for |
| spent the first four years of their lives cateringto their | | | | theirfeelings. |
| ever whim. We went to parks, amusement | | | | 2) The key to getting your children to listento you is - |
| arcades,the zoo. We participated in all the Mom and | | | | listen to them. |
| tot activitiesat the YMCA. It was a wonderful time for | | | | 3) Always know who their friends are. Make ita point |
| all of us. | | | | to observe your children with theirfriends. You will get |
| The problems started in junior high school. One day | | | | a better insightinto how your children behave when |
| Ivisited the school,unannounced, signed in at the | | | | you arenot around. |
| officeand was allowed to walk around the school to | | | | 4) When your children talk about what theirfriends are |
| find my preciousdarlings. What a found was not one | | | | doing... they are really talkingabout themselves. Offer |
| but two "little floozy(s)" dressedin skin-tight jeans with | | | | advice as if youare talking about their friend... not to |
| mascara and eyeliner so thick thatthey resembled twin | | | | them. |
| raccoons. I was mortified and embarrassed. | | | | 5) Build a relationship with each childindividually and then |
| Not only were they changing clothes when they | | | | collectively. |
| arrivedat school, they were changing their behavior. | | | | 6) Teach little acts of kindness These kindthoughts and |
| Their | | | | action accumulate over time. |
| Behavior was not good. My little darlings were out of | | | | Kindess forms a shield around the relationshipfor the |
| control. | | | | hard knocks that are sure to come. |
| They were skipping school and forging my signature. | | | | 7) Demand that they get involved with anextra |
| They were defiant. | | | | curricular activity. Then make thesame demand of |
| Their attitudes were in the toilet. | | | | yourself to get involved |
| Their grades were going downhill fast. | | | | With their school, activity, or club. |
| I was livid. That night my rage could not be controled. | | | | Being a parent takes work. The challengesand |
| I threatened them. I screamed at them and cried. It | | | | conflicts in our parent-child relationshipdid not change |
| wasthis moment that I regretted ever bringing them | | | | overnight. But the conflictsdiminished and our |
| into the world. | | | | relationship did changefor the better. |