Asking Vs Telling a Child With ODD to Complete a Task

Children with behavioral disorders are more likely tochoices about how or when a task is going to get
take advantage of a parent asking them to do acompleted. They need structure and guidelines.
chore or task rather than telling them to do the chore. ItTelling the child to put away their toys after dinner is
leaves too much room for any child to tell their parentsspecific and time bound. When giving the command,
"no" or to begin bargaining about what they will or willmake sure the tone of voice and body language
not do. Children with ODD are prone to defy theirreflect a statement and not a question. It is confusing
parent's requests. This is not because they are tryingto the child if the tone suggests they may have an
to be difficult but because their brain automatically tellsoption, when, in fact, they really do not.
them to be defiant.When a child refuses, calmly restate your command. It
How can parents reduce or eliminate some of thesemay be necessary to step closer to the child. This
defiant situations? Eliminate the options. It is not sociallytype of body positioning lets the child know you are
incorrect for a parent to tell their child to complete aserious. Stay firm in your direction and use your power
task. Parents often make the mistake of asking theas the leader/parent to get the task completed.
child to complete a task that they already know theyDo you want to learn exactly how to eliminate your
want done. Why set yourself up for the frustration?child's out-of-control and defiant behavior without using
The parents are in the leadership position and that isPunishments, Time-Outs, Behavioral Plans, or
their right and duty. A child does not need severalRewards?