Defiant Children - 4 Suggestions to Change Their Behavior

It seems to be a problem nowadays; a lot of parentslearn to control it. A child will copy the things their
don't know how to stop their children's behaviorparents do. Just because they are told these things
problems. It seems that how their own parents dealtare wrong they won't stop the bad behavior as long
with these issues (or didn't) isn't working on their kids.as their parents keep doing it. And it isn't enough just to
Where does the bad behavior come from?stop it; parents must explain to their children why they
There are a number of possible reasons. Some ofaren't doing these things anymore otherwise their
them are:children won't understand.
- It can come from watching other kids in the- Rules are meant to train children to become good
playground. These kids can be hitting other children, oradults. They are not meant to prevent them from
talking back to their parents, or even swearing. Whenmaking mistakes. If your child doesn't have room to
our children don't see any consequences for thesegrow, relax some of the rules. Does your child do
actions they assume they can do it themselves.things that are dangerous? Have a rule. Does your
- The kids may be modeling their parents. Dad swears,child swear, hit, and do bad things? Then have rules for
Mom screams, or both get violent. Guess what, theythese but be clear that acting in this way is
see that this must be okay. They certainly don'tinappropriate. And there are things that can be
understand it when their parents chastise them for it.overlooked. Just because you might think that it is
- The parents may be too strict or too lenient. If adisgusting for a child to roll around on the grass and
parent has lots of rules with tough consequences thatget his jeans stained doesn't necessarily make it
are earned for bad behavior then a child may rebel.worthy of punishment.
On the other hand if there are no rules or the rules- Similarly if there are no rules how does a child know
aren't enforced the child will behave the way theythat smacking a neighbor's kid is wrong if they haven't
want to. So can anything be done about it?been taught? Or perhaps they know all of your rules
Here are some suggestions to stop the behaviorbut you never give them consequences for breaking
problems:them. They are going to learn that the rules are
- Teach your children what is right from what is wrong.meaningless. Make sure there are appropriate ones
Have a discussion with them about what other childrenand they always receive consequences when the
are doing. Tell them why some of these things arerules are broken. Try to strike a good balance, enough
wrong. Let them know that acting this way won't berules to teach the lessons of life but not so many that
tolerated.your child feels constricted and wants to rebel.
- If parents indulge in bad behavior then they must