| Do you ever feel you don't understand your child's | | | | different and explore what his feelings really are. |
| feeling? | | | | Your son comes home and slams the door as he |
| Children often don't understand why they feel like they | | | | enters the house. |
| do. They need us to help to unwrap those feeling and | | | | "I hate George." |
| let them express what's going on in their lives. We | | | | "You must feel really angry with him. What happened |
| need to learn good parenting skills in order to do this. | | | | to make you feel like this?" |
| Has your child ever come home and said he now | | | | "I'd like to hit him. He chose to work on a project with |
| hates someone whith whom he was a good friend | | | | David and didn't choose me and I had to work with |
| only a day before? | | | | Peter and we didn't finish the work in time and NOW I |
| How do you deal with it? | | | | have to finish it for homework." |
| Does the scenario run something like this? | | | | "That must annoy you." |
| Your son comes in and slams the door as he enters | | | | "I wanted to play football tonight and now I can't. It's not |
| the house | | | | fair. He didn't even ask me what we were doing." |
| "I hate George" | | | | "I can see why your cross" |
| "I'm sure you don't. He's your best friend" | | | | Letting him express his anger may seem an unusual |
| "I DO HATE him. He's stinky" | | | | way of dealing with his outburst. When a person's |
| "Don't be silly. I'm sure you don't mean that" | | | | angry having someone argue the point only makes |
| "YES I DO. I HATE HIM " | | | | them angrier. After letting him vent his feelings his |
| "You played with him yesterday and had lots of fun" | | | | anger will usually die down and he'll be able to think a |
| "No it wasn't. It was a stinky game." | | | | little more rationally about the whole situation. Then |
| This conversation continues for ages your child getting | | | | you'll be able to work out a solution to the situation. |
| angrier and determined that he'll wins this argument | | | | "Maybe if I do my Homework quickly I could still play |
| and prove he really means what he says. | | | | football. I could ask George if he wants to play too" |
| Your child may not need you to hold this kind of | | | | If the way your responding now isn't working then try |
| conversation with him. Sometimes what he needs is | | | | something different |
| you to sympathize and explore what has happened to | | | | It's a good parenting skill to learn how to change your |
| make him feel like this about George. | | | | approach to something different if what you're doing |
| When this type of thing happens try something | | | | isn't working. |