| I'll bet that when you found out that you were going to | | | | for your child is to learn how best to parent the child |
| have a baby, you were ecstatic. You daydreamed | | | | that you have, not the ideal child that you wanted. Do |
| about what he would look like, you picked out names, | | | | not waste time and effort trying to help your child to |
| and you thought about what you would enjoy doing | | | | feel better, but give your child strategies to be better. |
| together. And then, he was born. I can guarantee that | | | | Bring more structure into your home. Avoid pointless |
| you did not daydream about having a defiant child. You | | | | power struggles. Teach your child accountability and |
| did not long for the arguments, the tantrums, or the | | | | problem solving skills to avoid future confrontations. |
| doors slamming. | | | | I have heard many times that children will not act out if |
| One of the biggest problems that parents with a | | | | they have a better self esteem, or if they "feel better |
| defiant child face is realizing that their child is not the | | | | about themselves." In my years as a parent, coach, |
| ideal child that they imagined. The perfect child that you | | | | and teacher, I have found the opposite to be true. |
| imagined, the one who is always obedient, cleans up | | | | Children, and especially defiant children, feel better |
| after himself, and says please and thank you does not | | | | about themselves when they do the right thing. If you |
| exist. Parents need to come to grips with the fact that | | | | want to help your defiant child, learn the parenting skills |
| they have a defiant child and not an ideal child before | | | | that instill accountability and teach problem solving skills. |
| any changes in behavior can take place. | | | | With these building blocks in place, your child will learn |
| If you have a defiant child you need to realize that | | | | to be better, and you will be amazed at the difference |
| your child is not the ideal child and that you are not the | | | | in your relationship. |
| perfect parent. One of the best things that you can do | | | | |